What is going on at The Ministry of Finance?


Sir William 'Bill' Allen

Nassau, Bahamas — A source deep inside the OPM said to BP, ” the story in the Guardian this morning involving the Customs Department and the slackness over there is multiplied ten times over in the Ministry of Finance”. We reported here that Junior Minister Laing is an incompetent idiot and the Consultant, Bill Allen is “brain dead”.

You may recall that we reported that Bungling Bill “Bacardi Eight” Allen may have been the “architect’ of the austerity budgets that saw increases of duty on children books and even the Holy Bible. Another source within the Ministry of Finance said to us,” the damage that Bill Allen has inflicted on the Bahamian People will be felt for generations to come”.

Meanwhile, we have it on good authority that a media house may have been issued a threat by Bill Allen and the WUTLESS Junior Minister of Finance. We have been advised that the media boss was told not to have Al Jarrett on his show anymore or there will be consequences. Bill Allen was reported to have said, ” Al Jarrett will not work as a Consultant or serve as a Director anywhere in this Country as long as I have something to do with it.”

Bill Allen and the wutless Junior Minister of Finance, Mona Vie Laing have been embarrassed by Al Jarrett for the deceptive Budget they brought to Parliament. Specifically as it relates to the true debt to GDP ratio. They have been found wanting.

A sleeper source in the Ministry of Finance has told BP, “We are hearing talk around the office that “disgraced Accountant” and former Senior Partner at PriceWaterhouse Coopers, Mr. Ishmael Lightbourne is to assume a position in the Ministry to assist Mr. Ehurd Cunningham.

Zhivargo Laing

Our readers should note that Mr. Cunningham and Mr. Ingraham were said to have shared an efficiency apartment years ago. They are said to be very close friends and that Mr. Ingraham takes care of his friends. Mr. Cunningham may have been Mr. Ingraham’s bestman or vice versa.

It is also being said that Mr. Lightbourne is supposedly friends of both Mr. Ingraham and Mr. Christie. A Senior PLP member who wished to remain nameless at this time said, “Lightbourne, Ingraham and Christie were all tight in the PLP, In fact after the Chief, Sir Lynden, fired these two “Mongrels”, Lightbourne was their man on the Council.”

The source continued, “In fact Christie wanted to give him a job after the scandal at PriceWaterehouse Coopers, but he took plenty flack from the fellas so he backed down. He then allegedly got his brother to give him a job”.

We see why the Country is the way it is, kisses go by favours in this town and Christie is no better than Ingraham, we need change from both of these Mongrels, who have been “Wards of the State” for more than 30 years.


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